More issues than a magazine rack

I have lots of pictures to post. The baby is just about 11 1/2 months old. I have a post in my head about that. I have a post in my head about the fact that my middle son is perhaps....a little bit crazy. And my 6 year old is acting like a teenager already. But I just can't post about these things now. I need to post about something that I don't have a picture for. Something that has been on my mind for....well....for as long as I can remember. Having children has magnified this issue by about a thousand. Here goes.
I really hate the sound of my children chewing. And my husband too. They are all ice chewers. As in - they go to the fridge, get a cup filled with too much "crunched" ice and water. They drink the water and then crunch on the ice for the next hour or so. They're even training the baby. He knows when there is ice around and crawls over to them Saying "num num num" enthusiastically on his way across the room. And chips. Or pretzels. Don't even get me started. When I have to listen to them crunching....it makes my hair hurt. I casually cover my ears while pretending to rest my chin on my hands. And they aren't necessarily chewing with their mouths open. My kids aren't being raised in a barn (some might argue that the jury is still out on that one........) I tell them all the time to chew with their mouths closed. They're pretty good about it. But I can hear them crunching anyway. Like fingernails on a chalkboard. It just kills me. And cereal! Cereal is a bad one....because they slurp it. Know what I mean? They simultaneously take a bite of the cheerios and slurp the milk off the spoon. And honestly - they aren't really being obnoxiously rude or loud - I'm just super sensitive to it. I don't say anything, because I know that it's me - not them - who has the problem.
Also....I can't stand talking to people on the phone while they are eating. It's awful. I can't even focus on what they are saying because I can't get past the chewing. Mind you, it's evident that they are taking small bites....trying to be quiet about it. I think that they think I don't know they're eating. But I know. Oh boy - do I know. It's as if I can feel their sandwich starting to ooze into my ear. It's all I can do to keep myself from quietly hanging up on them.

And there you go! A little peek into my craziness. From me to you. You're welcome.

"Staycation" - an attack.

I know...I'm such a fair weather blogger. I don't have a good excuse for my absence either! I suppose I could tell you that I've been far too busy - what with all extravagant vacations and trips to the spa....but that would just be obnoxious. And also a lie.

Speaking of vacations, have you heard this term floating around? : "STAYCATION"
IE -
"Oh we're just going to stay here and really rest. You know, really take a break. Sit outside. Read a few books. Disconnect the computer and the tv and the phone. Enjoy each other. We're going to have ourselves a little STAYCATION.

Whoever thought that up should really be kicked in the shins. The idea that I could perhaps relax in my own home is just ridiculous! What about all the socks? What about the wayward pieces of foliage and two week old pieces of chicken nugget that find their way into the mouth of my youngest child? What about all the poop - In the diapers of the youngest, in the skid mark riddled undies of the middle child, and the monstrous, often toilet clogging poops from the oldest child? What about that? Can I sip an alcohol laden umbrella drink while unclogging the toilet? No? How about while I'm giving the "it isn't okay to pee on the side of the house" lecture to two half naked, trouble making boys? I mean I suppose I could enjoy a cocktail while I'm "mothering" but really - that wouldn't be responsible of me. You see, cocktails make me sleepy and I can't get tired when there's dinner to be made.

Yikes, I sound bitter.

I need a VACATION!!!

rant over.

More pictures of my baby with food on his face - the Patriotic Version

He enjoyed his first cupcake in honor of Independence Day. Good practice for his upcoming birthday. He thought it was FANTASTIC.

The Dedication

A few weeks ago, we had Jack dedicated at our Church. The other boys were baptised as babies, but this church does things a little differently and it was just as special. The Family Pastor who also happens to be a good friend (and the Daddy of Jack's little girlfriend and her two older brothers who play with N. & R. ) said some lovely things about our little (huge) baby. Hopes for his future, that we will guide him in the right direction, and help him to grow into a man of faith. It was a really nice service. I always feel a real sense of contentment and assurance once my babies are blessed "officially."

The pictures from the day are TERRIBLE. This is the only one that sort of came out. Standing up there was the five of us, plus my Mom. Might have been nice to have a picture! I love my sister (who is reading this right now - hi!) but I will never put her in charge of pictures again! So you're off the hook as far as photography Shawnee. To be fair, I can't expect everyone to think like a scrapbooker. Am I the only one who walks through life composing pages during everyday events? Good Lord indeed!

The Stuff of Summer

It was blazing hot last week. Jack icked up his shirt and had to go topless at the park.

N. and R. just wrapped up their first session of swimming lessons. They are both doing really well, and N. loved the opportunity to dive off the diving board the other day. We broke down and bought the family membership to the local pool - best money ever spent. They love to swim! Proving once again that they are their Father's sons, my boys happily got up at 5am the other day to go fishing. Armed with donuts, OJ, and all of their gear, they set out for one of the local fishing spots. They rented a motor boat and were on the water, polls out - by 6:00AM. They didn't get home until well after noon. The three of them had such a great time - both boys caught fish (a trout for N. and a blue gill for R.) and Daddy even showed them how to clean them. At that point, they morphed into their Mother and were completely disgusted. I was so proud of Big Al for taking some decent pictures of the trip. Next time though, I'm hoping he'll wipe the powdered sugar off of their faces first! Oh, and in case you're wondering - NO. I didn't cook them. They are in the freezer next to other frozen items that will never be eaten - lima beans, pork chops from 2006, you get the picture.